Test Your Canadian IQ

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Canadian Bacon DVD

Click "Next" at the bottom of the page to see the answers.

1) True or false? The handles on cases of beer in Canada are wider to accommodate gloved hands.

2) Ninety percent of Canadians live…
a) in small, dark homes.
b) within 10 miles of the U.S. border.
c) with their mothers.
d) in a town with three or more hockey rinks.

3) Which of the following is not from the South Park song "Blame Canada?
a) With all their beady little eyes
And flappin' heads so full of lies
b) They're not even a real country anyway
c) They marry gays smoke reefer like hay And suspiciously friendly, eh?
d) With all their hockey hullabaloo And that bitch Anne Murray too

4) Which of the following is not a major economic engine in the Kootenays?
a) co-ops
b) grow-ops
c) heli-ops
d) IHOPs

5) True or false? California has a bigger population than Canada.

6) In Canada, Canadian bacon is…
a) unavailable.
b) rolled in cornmeal.
c) the same thing as American bacon.
d) kosher.
e) the most rented VHS tape in Newfoundland.

7) "Homo milk is…
a) something too gross to describe here.
b) whole milk.
c) skim milk.
d) what Canadian baristas call soy milk.

8) If a "loonie is a $1 coin with a loon on it, a "toonie must be…
a) a $1 coin with a cartoon on it.
b) a $2 coin without a loon on it.
c) spelled wrong, you idiot.
d) a Canadian term for a DJ.

9) True or false? Winnie-the-Pooh is named after the city of Winnipeg.

10) A "toque (pronounced tuke) is…
a) a winter hat.
b) the Eskimo word for "toonie.
c) lost in translation.
d) something you take from a pipe.

11) The expression "open-boundary policy refers to…
a) the Canada-U.S. Free Trade Agreement.
b) Canadian ski areas.
c) an obscure rule in Canadian football.
d) ladies' night at The Boot in Whistler.
e) all of the above.

12) The capital of Canada is…
a) Toronto.

b) Ottawa.
c) Winnipeg.
d) Iowa.
e) Regina (hint: sounds like…).

["The Answers"]

1) TRUE
2) B
3) C
4) D
5) TRUE
6) B
7) B
8) B
9) TRUE
10) A
11) E
12) B

DECEMBER 2005