Homeslope Security

Hot List

Instead, more and more army-influenced gear is coming to a store near you. Buy it if you must—but first ask yourself: Do i really want to look meaner than i am?

1. Giro Bad Lieutenant helmet

For intimidating slacker lifties into sweeping the snow off your chair. $60, giro.com

2. Quiksilver Stifler sweater

Named for the character in American Pie, but decidedly more Black Hawk Down. $65, quiksilver.com

3. Dragon Foil goggles

The optical equivalent of fake vampire teeth. $85, dragonoptical.com

4. Oakley Elite Special Forces Assault Boots

In case you end up at happy hour behind enemy lines. $225, oakley.com

5. Grenade Gloves Bullet Belt

Nothing says “I’m feeling randy like fake shells around your hips. $28, grenadegloves.com

6 Burton AK 3L Vent Pants

In case you get hired by Halliburton. $300, burton.com

7 Dakine Canteen

The Army has pretty much switched to hydration systems—but so what? $15, dakine.com

November 2004